Author: Chris

Well done all that made it this far! It’s been emotional! This will likely be my last blog of this holiday (maybe just some FB posts, maybe not), unless something screws up spectacularly between here and Cheadle Hulme.

Tomorrow should be a day of chilling, casual packing, a bit of clean & tidy & then something for a late lunch. Anything to avoid paying the McDonalds prices at Dalaman Airport, which has a reputation for taking advantage of a captive market, let’s say!

Out private transfer is booked for. 6:30 pickup, with an hour to the Airport, leaving just over a couple of hours to make it to gate assuming no delays on the flight.

So today, not unexpectedly for the regular reader, we’ve done bugger all, kind of. The usual getting up at the crack of 10am, then a relaxed breakfast. Actually, Jane did go into clean up mode and has done some washing of tea towels & other bits and pieces that we’ve used whilst here. Then breakfast.

Eeking down of supplies meant breakfast was a “half of whatever is left” type deal. Oh well, the sun was over the yardarm, so I rationed out a bottle of Bomonti to wash down the Aryan.

Summary for this year is as follows:

• The first week was darn hot, to the point where we didn’t do some of the things we planned to do, but that just meant we did stuff we hadn’t planned on doing quite as much of – totally relaxing & enjoying ourselves! Doing stuff is over-rated sometimes.
• The water issues created a few minor challenges, but Schlick happens, and it only really compromised us once (where we were too lazy & sticky to go out).
• The Apartment is, once again, superb! The layout, the facilities, the location, the views. Fabulous! Thank you to our hosts for making it available again – we love it here!
• The people we’ve been lucky enough to meet & interact with over here, as I’ve said, are so welcoming & friendly. I really do recommend visiting!
• We discovered the Dolmus! Bloody hell, it puts out bus service to shame (no fault of our drivers and staff, imho). Every 5-20 minutes route dependent and great value. The little jaunt out to Saklikent yesterday was a definite highlight, part of which was down to the Dolmus rides.
• The food is so good! I asked Lurchio this evening what’s the best about the holiday and his answer was the weather (not controversial having heard about what we are arriving back to), and the food. The food can suit all budgets and tastes, but I really recommend searching out some good local/traditional dishes, as well as the pizza, pasta, steaks etc.

So, today! We headed down to the pool to throw towels on sunbeds given we were now in a competitive poolside environment. First line captured and secured by the advance party (Jane).

After throwing a bottle or two of water into the pool to provide additional rations for the now-encamped ground troop, the final phase of our Blitzkrieg was put into action where I went for the Vernichtungsschlacht (utter & total annihilation) approach, throwing my towel across a sunbed and then establishing a base overseeing the enemy forces (on the other side of the pool), resulting in a unilateral victory in my humble opinion.

I knew this when Carl & Angela from Sale, with their daughter & son, leaned over their balcony, introduced themselves, said “hi” and we had a good old chinwag. Lovely folks. Might even go for a pint with Carl in the Volunteer when we get back – he likes a nice, malty amber ale.

He mentioned about setting off to the shops shortly, and would we like anything picking up whist he was out. We had won a battle and lost a war. What nice people. Therein an example of the futility of all wars. No one wins, you only lose.

Enough of these ridiculous and sketchy analogies! I’m clearly a Bomonti too far, and definitely a belly full of too much good food! Focus, Chris!

Carl & his daughter (Portia, I think), joined us around the pool later in the avo, and more chinwagging was done. So much so, that both Jane & I took our eye of our suncream regime. We now have some sunburn, but thankfully low level.

At around 4:30 we bud our farewell for the evening and headed back for cold drinks, cold showers and (sorry folks) on my part, some cold air-drying sat in line with the aircon.

We’d booked a table for uç (like the lemon alcohol from the 90s, “‘Ooch”), at 7pm down at Suat’s place, Shiraz, so with 15 mins to go, we set off, mini bags of rubbish in hand which were deposited in the “end of street” Mini skips, before dodging the traffic & crossing the upper, then lower road.

On arrival, and after drink we’re served (where it turns out Jane now has a penchant for ‘Sex On The Beach’ yet we never went to Oludeniz) the meal was predictably fantastic.

Lurchio had the chicken goujons, Jane the calamari, and I had the nicely hot & spicey prawns as starters.

Mains were a moussaka for Jane & then two portions of the Steak Pegasus – strips of fillet, in a herby spicy marinade. Properly tasty, and I’ll say this again, the steaks here are way better than anything I’ve ever had in France.

Towards the end of the meal, we got chatting to Suat, who does know our hosts well. The table behind had mentioned they were from Wigan & I heard him mention about having been there & Preston.

I inevitably therefore mentioned that I was a born Wigan’er, but now resided in “South Manchester”. He asked where, and if we were near Stockport, because he’d been. He’d been and had a meal at the “Church Inn, in Cheadle Hulme?”. About 3 minutes in a car from our house!

Great fella, great staff, food & location. We settled the Hesap, and bud our farewells “until next time”.

A walk home and the now obligatory corner shop stop for Lurchios imported beers (Corona). In the queue to pay, suddenly my ear tickled. A fly? I brushed it away. Nope. Ear tickle then a tap on the right shoulder. I looked – nothing. The lad serving us smiled, so I knew then. Turning to my left, our friend the shopkeeper was there smiling. I gave him a hug (think that surprised him, but hope it didn’t make him uncomfortable), wished him well and we arranged that next time I’m here, just to WhatsApp him and he will deliver two boxes of Bomonti, a pallet of Corona, a litre of Ayran and some Lurpak. Bless him, he knows us so well!

Home, up the hill for probably the last time this hols, and the conclusion of this years holiday blog.

Thanks for the positive comments & messages, folks. Although I do still try and convince myself that I’m just doing it for me, I’ve realised it’s a shared experience & the reader must also get something from these musings.

I was asked by one of my very good friends how I remember the detail. A great question, as it’s not my forte. But in this scenario, the act of diarising what we’ve done (or not done!), means I relive the day as I write, but also try to be more present during the day. More aware of details that on reflection, make you smile or grimace.

Hopefully the next sentence makes you smile.

Well done! It’s over – you’ve completed this years blog, so thank you for your tolerance of bad grammar, spelling an stuff!

Much love,

Chris

x

One of the things from yesterday that went unmentioned, as we relaxed and became more ‘present’ & without wanting to sound poncy, was that we have been watching the birds more. Loads of doves. Not those massive lazy turd-machines we see in our back gardens, but some Formula 1 versions in a gaudy brown and black Benneton livery. Lithe, nimble, on it (“like a car bonnet”).

Those and the many, many house-martin type things zapping around – the bird equivalent of a Mk VI Spitfire. Way above the skill, awareness, agility & understanding of its ‘self’ of anything else in its class. Basically the ‘David Silva’ of bird-aero. Champion!

Whilst it may be the much under-rated, hard worker, with less of the grace but more of the Hurricane firepower, there’s a Dove nesting on a toilet window ledge between our balconies. I tried as best as I could to take a photo when ‘mum’ wasn’t there of the nest – two eggs! Looking good, and being cared for on her frequent returns.

We won’t be here to see any chicks fly the nest, and I hope they do, but I will enjoy the thought of their impending adventures!

Oh, we have downstairs neighbours! I think? Some folks arrived at around midnight, and looked very much like we did when we first came here – a bit bewildered and lost.

I decided it was time for bed (00:20) when the drum beaters from across the hillside seemed to think that Totos Africa was a good place to pick up their pace & volume.

So then to the alarm! Yes, I was so paranoid about getting up at the crack of 10am, I set an alarm! It scared the bejeezus out of me! But we got up, and, the big moment, knocked on Lurchios door, to see if he was actually going to spend any time with us.

The answer (20 minutes from setting off)? “I’ll let you know nearer the time”. As the key opened the door to leave, he announced his attendance.

We headed down to the bus stop to get the next Dolmus to Fethiye where the plan was to switcheroo onto a Saklikent-bound bus. 60Tl and about 25 minutes later we did indeed switcheroo.

We got decent seats on a funky little Dolmus, and meandered our way through the Turkish countryside, which of itself was good to see. As we approached Saklikent, it became self-evident why this is a National Park.

If the mountains around us were transposed into the Lake District, we would never stop banging on about them, they’re that tall, imposing and impressive! The peaks are way, way above the tree line. Reminded me of Mont Ventoux (which I once rode up and down, but enough of that bragging).

We arrived at Saklikent Gorge, and first impressions were it seemed a bit, well, touristy. Which it is, kind of.

But very quickly, we realised it’s just busy in a good way, so they need restaurants, parking, Toilet blocks, and all the facilities to support this level of popularity.

We headed straight to a cafe/restaurant where once again, the manager engaged with us, asked about what ever happened to Manchester United, and just how good was it to see Stonsey play into midfield. Nice guy.

Three (uç) sandwiches each freshly made to order, with soft drinks for 410TL – about £11. No one here, it turns out was taking the proverbial. Prices all really good.

Which included our next purchase! £15/head for what we’d really come for – rafting down the icy-cold, glacially blue river. £10 for 45 mins or £15 for 1:30h. No brainier! What I didn’t realise was that Lurchio & I were the only folk that day, and most other days to venture beyond the 45.

Jane, her decision affected by the yelps from others as they entered the ice-blue water, decided to sit and sunbathe around the swimming pool.

They take safety seriously, so Lurchio & I donned ill-fitting helmets and, once they strapped two together for me, life jackets. Then the big inflatable pile-cushion/rubber ring, and some oars.

Safety briefing over, we headed down to the river to be gracefully launched.

But before that. You’ve all seen those sad news articles haven’t you? Where there’s a photo of a crowd of holiday makers looking mournfully at a whale that’s been washed up, grounded & therefore stranded in shallow water?

So, Lurchio got in, flexing his anaemic, stick-like limbs & went bobbing off downstream.

My turn…immediately grounded, my guide tried to push me into the Thalweg (see Mr Geography Smith, I was listening!). He ended up red-faced and had to enlist his mate, who, when we all worked together, managed to tip me into the main river. As graceful as one of those videos of ships being launched side-on, rather than in their intended direction of travel.

After which, for the next 45 minutes or so, less about 5 minutes where I bottomed out again, we spent our time ambling down a (yes, icy cold) river that at its deepest was probably about 18”. It was really good fun. Even Lurchio cracked a smile!

We were syphoned off into a tributary, and then assisted to dry land, where for the rest, their rings, oars and selves were loaded into or onto a minivan. For Lurchio & I, we were offered fresh rings (why not) and oars, and asked to wait for 5 minutes.

In those 5 minutes, I was left with the impression that the elder chap was asking “who the **** allowed a 1:30?!”. After which there was further discussion, until eventually one young lad, now with a face like a slapped arse as it seemed he’d drawn the short straw, jumped on a ring, oar in hand and asked that we joined him.

We did. The next 45 minutes were a bit…different, to the first 45. I’ve never been, nor ever wanted to go white-water rafting. And whilst I’m being over-dramatic, the second half of our trip was much more “that way” than the first. Big boulders to be navigated, with the swirling dips after. Lurchio got stuck on the top of a rock at one point, not that we saw it, as my “momentum” seemed to whisk me ahead to the point where even our guide was only looking backwards for signs of the yellow-helmeted apparition.

We survived (we were never in danger) and in reality it was also great fun, and showed how little exhilaration we have experienced recently.

It took a while for the three of us to get picked up, but eventually the radically air-conditioned minivan arrived. Air conditioned because there was a hole in the roof, holes in the floor, and, as it seemingly was free of any exhaust system, had a good flow of “air” throughout.

We arrived back high on adrenaline and exhaust fumes and told Jane she’d made the right choice as she would have crapped herself. Never good when in a confined sea-going vessel, surrounded by others.

It was getting on, and we had noted that the Dolmus took more time than expected, so we headed back to our pal to buy cold drinks and water for the bus.

He thanked us, and before congratulating me on my Turkish, suggested that he felt it was time to give Oscar Bobb, McAtee and some of the youth team players a chance to make the first team. He seems to have seen more of the Academy than I, so I nodded in acknowledgement and bid him farewell. Oh, and he said Gvardiol was in the week before and was asking if the Turkish supermarket on Bury Old Road sold Ayran still. Wasn’t sure what to make of that.

The journey back to Fethiye was ace. We saw some wonderful things. A little lad with his Nan, who fell deeply asleep in a way only little folk can do, like a rag doll. Then, a moped passed us, both rider & pillion without helmets (not that uncommon) and both also about age 10. Then, as we approached the outskirts of Fethiye, Nan woke the little lad, as it was nearly their stop. He literally couldn’t keep his eyes open. It was a fabulous watch, only ended when little lad was carried off the bus, and another passenger had to help Nan offload her shopping.

After getting off in central Fethiye, we headed towards the Old Town, to find something for tea. On the way however, Jane fessed that she really, really needed a wee. My inbuilt satnav engaged and within seconds Jane was able to visit a loo. It just meant that we felt obliged to order a craft ale from the bar we were then sat in to ensure we met the ‘toilets for customers only’ criteria. And stroke cats.

From there, Lurchio announced he was about to die if he didn’t eat something, so we raced down to Genis, a restaurant on the harbour side, in a life-saving manner. What a drama!

Some seafood pasta, Italian style pizza & octopus starter later, I got distracted by a chap on a boat, with his apprentice/junior, welding up a new stainless guardrail on a fancy yacht. (TIG welding, I presume ?).

What a shambles! We watched him tack-weld in 3 sections, and then cut them out at least 5 times. My father-in-law would have something to say to him, for sure! Mainly, put the stuff together first, get a good fit, THEN tack-weld and neaten up. It got me so badly that I swore in his general direction and ended up offending the table across. Apology was offered.

From there, if you’re still reading, you’ll be delighted to know, we just headed back to the Dolmus, rode that home, and I’m now sat contemplating the last full day here tomorrow!

Where has the time gone?!

Right, I’ve about 20mins of faffing about to do to get this online, so see you tomorrow, you gorgeous people.

Chris

x

Before I get into the nothingness that was today, if you’re on your phone reading this, open your notepad, close your eyes and try and type ‘the sun is yellow’ without looking & cheating. How’d you get on? Nailed it? Thought so.

Anyway, today… this is likely the shortest blog ever.

We woke up around 7:30am, but just lay in bed. Jane got up around 9:30 to head down and onto the balcony, whereas I pushed on with my world domination of the Solitaire app, which due to my OCD, I have now completed each daily challenge for the last 2,736 days consecutively, and am at Level 1,314. Must make a note to update my CV & LinkedIn skills.

We’ve done almost nothing. It’s been brilliant! A bit of bread, cheese, tomato, coffee & ayran for me. I’ve yet to convince Jane to try the Ayranian delights of a slightly salted, slightly soured cold savory yoghurt-based beverage! Not sure why.

We did have a brief conversation about Lurchio who could have asked a mate to join us, but seems like he couldn’t be arsed with the faff.

As we listened to a medley of Pet Shop Boys Greatest Hits, Jane proffered the question about why he hadn’t brought one of his mates?

I adjusted my underpants (barely visibly due to the beer belly) which was my only donned clothing at the time, adjusted the crotch elastic, and chugged on a Bomonti beer to rinse down the Ayran, before answering “I don’t know. It’s baffling to be honest”. And then burped.

Pool time! Even Lurchio joined us at around 4pm, not that he conversed, but he did arrive, AirPods in, sunglasses on, and then lay there for half an hour, before heading off with a cool & cursory “I’m going back”.

We hung about longer, but the lack of a breeze did make it feel as hot as yesterday, so by 5:30, we also called it a day & headed upstairs for a chill-out, and then a shower & change for the evening.

We decided to go where we hadn’t the energy for last night and wandered down to Cazibe, a nearby tapas style cafe/bar on the lower road, just a bit further in from Shiraz, and the neighbouring Sandinos.

Once again, the welcome & service was superb, and the owner/host took the time to explain the menu, and advise that 3 dishes was probably a good amount per person.

Here’s what we ordered:

• • Hummus
• • Chinese chicken bites
• • Smoky meatballs
• • Babaganoush
• • Cazibe Börek
• • Cazibe prawns
• • Mozzarella & spinach sticks
• • Zingy Thai fish cakes
• • Mini Chicken Kiev

Special mention & recommendation for the very smokey babaganoush, the Thai fish cakes and the Mini (they were bigger than golf balls!) Chicken Kiev – all fab!

Not much more to say about a very slow day today, other than we are planning our biggest excursion so far tomorrow, with a Dolmus trip to Saklikent National Park, and the Gorge there tomorrow.

So hopefully some better “content” tomorrow, albeit unlikely to eclipse the day we had in Pembrokeshire, where our poor dog expressed his loose bowels across a busy pavement, and a kid walked into me as I tried to shield it, and landed hands and knees down in ‘dog-do gravy’.

For folk new to this sort of diatribe, if you really want to suffer, my back-catalogue of previous holiday blogs can be found here.

Best of luck & lots of love,

Chris

x

Up with the larks today at around 10:00am. We had to be as Jane & I had booked in for Traditional Turkish Breakfast at Narli Bahçi – ‘Pomegranate Garden’ Restaurant. Another recommendation from our host, which we never managed to get to last year.

I’d figured it was a 20 minute downhill walk, so we set off just after 10:30 and headed down the hill.

Oh, I sort of feel obliged to mention that we have leccy, water, clear pool etc. All the stuff that may be interpret as a moan or downside – none were – all just things to navigate. I’m not mentioning them again, I hope.

Anyway, part of my hidden agenda for suggesting that we walked down, was I’ve yet to see a wild tortoise. I still haven’t. Lurchio has. How the hell does that happen?!

T’was hot, mind. Suspect they are of a higher intelligence than I, and made the sensible decision to stay in the shade.

We got there with minutes to spare. Not that the gates were going to clang shut and 1 second past 11am, of course, but I do like punctuality.

With a wonderfully friendly greeting, “Ah, Jane? 11am. Welcome & just relax”, we were seated in the loveliest of gardens, all set up with companion planting (where edibles are planted next to/near “showy stuff” that the slugs attack instead of the foody stuff).

We confirmed to the young lad, a family member, that then served us that we’d like the trad brekky. Well, without going all Frankie Howerd, we were taken aback by what then happened.

For the next 5 minutes all that happened was that food kept being brought to the table. Lots and lots of different foods, all (with a slight exception for the olives) looking really good.

First up was a shallow bowl to share of a warm lentil soup. Back when, if honest, I’d have passed on that. But I tried it and it was really tasty. And was a good reminder to give stuff a go, at least once. “More to learn when you fail, than when you succeed”, as a friend of mine recently quoted.

Then ‘stuff’ just kept arriving! Until our table was full!

Jams, fried eggs, cheeses, honey, Turkish tea, home made bread, watermelon, pastries, veggies. You get the gist.

What a feast! Left in peace, we just tucked in, relaxed & enjoyed the moment. Oh, until the rectangular slice of cheese. Which, on record, I would tell anyone was the cheesiest cheese on Planet Cheese! Even Jane agreed. And with the orange jam, it was properly tasty!

Jane also had an epiphany & as a devout non tea or coffee drinker (and don’t even mention milk unless it’s in a hot chocolate), found the Turkish tea, and I’ll quote her now – “refreshing”.

I could go on about pretty much every dish served, but instead I’ll leave you to imagine. Except for two things. After deciding what we thought it was “worth” and what the bill might be (we hadn’t confirmed), we asked the fella for the bill (Hesap, remember?). As he presented us with the bill, he asked, with genuine care & interest if we had enjoyed it. We had. We paid what we had thought it was worth, which was a lot more that the bill. That’s not us splashing cash, that’s us simply paying what we felt it was worth. Bear in mind, this is all relative – heavily tipping the bill is easier when the bill is £9/head!

The second thing is the OMG moment! We were served a home-made pomegranate tea. Holy moly! Looks superb, smells superb & tasted like the best bits of a warmed Vimto. What a drink!

Having supped up, we also bought a couple of pots of jam, as we waited for a taxi (no way I was walking back, up that hill in 42C temps!).

One last point about Narli. It’s family run, and Ramsay, the main chap, was so proud of what they do – veggies grown & then served, herbs, the same, really focused on delivering a really relaxed experience. Brilliant!

We had planned on going to K Bar or one of the places on the bottom road into Hisaronu, but tbh, we just couldn’t be arsed. So after a sesh around the pool, we WhatsApp’d a pizza & garlic bread to the apartment, which turned out to be really good & just what the good doctor ordered!

After the delivered scran, the pool had visitors! What!? Suddenly there’s were a few local lads in the pool bar, switching into their trunks & having a laugh. There are two other apartments here, although we know one isn’t occupied whilst we are here, so I assume they’re to do with Musti from downstairs.

Lurchio & I had some ‘chores’ to do, mainly putting bottles in a bottle bank. But then on the way home, also calling in for more soft drinks (& Corona for Lurchio). Our superstar at the corner shop 8h dusted on it being a free delivery, and belted passed us on his scooter before laughing at us on his way down, with me still trying to breathe in via my arse, on the way up! Top lad, that fella.

Getting back, Lurchio took the delivery up to our floor, whilst I headed down to the pool. And with a “Merhaba!”, I gave them a heads up on my arrival. I showed them where the pool lights were but also asked if they could please make sure they turned them off as they left.

I also told one to “get out of my way!” With a smile on my face, before opening the poolside fridge up and grabbing a beer. We came to an agreement that they were all mine. Had a laugh & I left them to it. Sure enough, they left shortly after, with all looking tidy and the lights off, bless them.

And with the tune, well words, (there was a tune, but it was entirely different to the one that matched the song), of “Aaand sooo, Sally can wait!” via a distant Karaoke, I bid you adieu for the evening!

Lots of love

Chris

X

Literally! We had another sirocco storm last night, which temporarily took out the leccy. I know that because it switched the aircon off and I woke drenched in sweat!

Getting up this morn, we were greeted by the sight or rather the lack of, of the top of the Babadag Mountain, which is partially obscured by haze. As is the bottom of the normally crystal clear swimming pool. I think it must have been a dust storm as well last night.

They’ve had the Babadag cable car closed for the last few days due to the high winds, and there are definitely no signs of anyone paragliding at present. You’d have to be even more bonkers than normal to give that a go at present, as we suspect anyone trying to launch would immediately find themselves on the back side of the mountain heading down towards Antalya at a rapid rate of knots.

At midday, it was a marginally cooler 38C, with todays temps peaking at 40C by mid afternoon. Still no sign of water, but reserves still reasonable so no real impact again.

It does make you realise how much water you can avoid using with a little planning & thought. Storing & then using grey water for flushing, being one of the more obvious ones, put the plug in when you shower & save that for the loo, or dipping toothpaste-laden toothbrush into a small cup of drinking water, and then using that to rinse, rather than being one of those weirdos that has the tap running for the whole time teeth are being cleaned?!

Todays brunch selection was a variety classic. “Ham-like slices”, vine-ripened tomato, Wensleydale cheese & lovely bread. Seven possible classic sandwich topping combinations on one plate!

Just before we headed down to the pool, I clocked the fellas working on the development that’s going on down the hill from us. I believe there’s a rule that limits construction work when it’s ‘tourist season’, but these lads are like the SAS of construction. They sneak in, work tirelessly and relentlessly, almost invisibly, and put a shift in. Good grief, they put a shift in! Bravo, fellas! Bravo!

In the following photo, the grey house on the right looked like the house on the left on Friday afternoon. It’s now fully ‘first coat’ rendered on all sides. Workforce? Two fellas on the scaffolding, one mixing & then throwing the wet mix up to his mate, who then applied it to the brickwork. Heavy going, right? Especially as it’s been 40-46C and no cooler than 34C whilst they’ve been working!

Jane & I headed to the pool, where we both had a cooling dip, but then split – Jane sunbathing, and me swimming around and clearing the more obvious detritus from the pool.

Done, and then the same pattern as yesterday, despite the big drop-off in temps today (only 40C at this point), with 20/30 mins of lying in the sun, then a dip required.

Definitely some dust in the air by the way. Both Jane & I had sniffles and sneezes in the earlier part of the day, but that tailed off as the day wore on and it was visibly clearer up the top of Babadag by this point. And I said that, after what those builders are up to! What a wuss!

Back up to the apartment, and military planning of the low, but at least existent flow of water. Jane plus long hair first. Then Lurchio, so he has time to do his hair. Then the hairless one.

All washed & fresh, we did ‘the dance’. You know, the one that goes “what we doing then? What does anyone fancy?”. That’s then followed by a five minute shout out to places we could go, but all without commitment. That’s followed by a repeat of the first question. Then eventually we go with the initially suggested placez. All good, just after the ‘dance’. I’m a short dancer the older I get – “here’s what I want to do, which I think you will all like”.

We dolmused (bussed) it down into Hisaronu and walked down to Hidden Gem Restaurant. It’s top notch food (again, see last years blog for details) with really welcoming service.

Had a bit of a chinwag with the fella who seemed to be the owner, or al least in charge. “Yes, quieter. But picking up. Just worried about fires now, as if we had one here, well…”. Not quite comic timing, but as that sentence ended a fire truck sirened its way past the end of the street.

Moving on! Jane got all “Lairy Airey” again with her one solitary drink of the evening, a frozen strawberry daiquiri (seemingly her version of mothers ruin). I’d love to tell you the angle is making it look bigger/her smaller, but it did seem to be twice the size of her head…

Lurchio hit the Corona again, and I risked the least bad choice and had Efes Pilsner, which I may live to regret. I’ve a feeling they use half brewers yeast and half laxative in the brewing process.

Food-wise, it was easy. “Ballon bread and mixed mezze to start and uç (as in rabbit hutch but I only thought that and didn’t say it out loud), lamb chop, please”.

What a cracking spread! The mezze was lovely (I do like a bit of non-pickled beetroot) and the lamb chops were divine!

No apologies for food pictures incoming:

Cooked & seasoned perfectly, in my humble…

Even the ‘chips’ were more like roast potatoes, which is a good thing. Jane wasn’t overly impressed by her sprout-biased selection of veg, but we worked around that & I did the decent thing and ate a few.

Bill paid, we headed back towards the top end where the dolmas & taxi rank is. Which just so happens to be next to a chemist.

What to do…pay £14 for a 2 month supply of Lisinopril (I’m old, fat and as such have high blood pressure) back home or buy a 6 month supply of the same for 175Tlr – divide that by 34 to see the Sterling price.

Drug dealing over, we headed home on the dolmus. 45Tl (£1.32 for 3) later we headed back up the hill & settled in on the balcony.

Well, we tried! Holy moley! The winds had picked up and boy was it exciting out there! The chairs (and anything else loose) we’re taken in! Big gusts that rattled the glass panes, and the scaffolding on the houses on the site below!

And so there ended todays instalment of nonsense!

Much love to the berks reading this!

Chris

X

Well, another day where we only end up surfacing at late morning. And even that is only because we want to give the aircon units a bit of respite!

We had a big windstorm last night! Throughout the night we had Sirocco-like blasts of hot air totally unlike those Jane has become accustomed to. So much so, that I think we’ll take the patio chairs inside tonight, given Lurchios got blown from his balcony door onto the glass balustrade. Don’t tell our hosts, but he also forgot to Velcro a seat pad to his chair. Thankfully that was retrieved from to pool first thing, suffering from a mild bout of PTSD.

May as well get this out of the way. Todays morning “sit-rep” (situation report):

1. Water? It’s on sometimes and it’s off sometimes. Shlick happens.

2. Heat? Predicted 45+ degC so it’s going to be “hotter than a snakes ass in a wagon rut”, according to Adrian Cronauer.

This is likely going to be a short one, as tbh, when it’s 46C in the shade, there’s not a lot of energy left to do much more than sit/lie there. Even I have levels of mundane that I won’t stoop to write up!

Eventually, after our now traditional brunch, Jane & I headed to the pool. Separately. I was around 30 minutes behind as I’d found a dodgy stream to watch the Yokohama F Marinos play Man City in a pre-season friendly. First thing I learned? They aren’t the sheep-wool Marinos [sic] – it’s pronounced any other way you like other than like Merino wool. We won 5-3, after Big Erl (Haaland) ended a 6 minute goal drought.

First thing to do on my pool arrival was to don the goggles and fish out all the stuff that had blown in overnight, which apart from that cushion had nowt to do with us. Leaves, pine-like needles, a paper takeaway bag with mushy receipts (- I’d have delivered it back if I could have read it!).

After which, it was time for a Takeshi Castle type challenge – grease up with suncream and see how long the mad Englishman can sit (lie) out in the (near) midday sun. Suffice to say it was longer than I expected, but not longer than around half an hour!

Pool dip required every 20-30 mins for sure!

5:30pm arrived unexpectedly quickly. So I bailed, not long after Lurchio surfaced & drank my last poolside beer, I found out later.

So here’s the tiny little compromise that’s needed at the mo’ – downstairs spare room (no water pressure upstairs), shower cubicle, wet oneself (not like that, unless you want to), wet body scrub, turn off water, scrub oneself, cross fingers and hope for at least a dribble of water from the shower head to rinse down! Close all doors & curtains and air-dry by lying naked, directly under an aircon unit until dry and cool.

Moving swiftly along so one doesn’t dwell on that mental image, we congregated at around 7pm & wandered down to Sandinos. Well, when it’s this hot, you may as well have a curry, right?!

We went there last year and the Indian & Thai food is superb, and the people running the business are so lovely.

(Which, btw is a trait here. Yes, I’m aware we have gone to places that have been ‘tried & tested’ by others, but to a person, I’ve found everyone I’ve met to be really nice & welcoming, and it feels genuine, not just ‘retail patter’).

We all ordered from the set menu, with me having the (world renowned) onion bhajis, followed by a chicken dupiaza, whilst Jane & Charlie went for butter chicken and a chicken Balti respectively.

Full as a bull, we ‘Hesap Lütfen’d’ & paid the bill in Sterling, leaving a decent enough tip, I hope. Such lovely people.

A hot and sticky walk back via our man at the corner shop, where I ordered a crate (20) of Bomonti and then Ninja Lurchio silently tipped up with 6 bottles of Corona.

I asked if it could be delivered. “Yes, of course!”. “Tomorrow?” I asked? “No! Give me 5 minutes!” he answered. He gave me a cold beer for the 5 minute walk home, and after paying, we set off home.

As we were unlocking the door, our beer was delivered.

He gave me the box of 20, which was now opened slightly. This is where you have to recalibrate. Bottles missing? Swaps for some crappy stuff? Tampering? Well yes, he tampered with the previously unopened box. By swapping 8 warm beers for 8 straight from the fridge. This fella is a legend. He knows his shtick!

And so, I finish todays blog with a cold beer in hand, and wish you all the best, if you’ve managed to stay awake through this one, and have got this far! Remember, your choice! I don’t offer compensations for loss of will to live!

Night night!

Chris

x

I started today with a nip back down to the corner shop to buy fresh bread. (We bough 15l of drinking water after being dropped off by the Taxsi, last night).

The fresh bread here is superb. We used to go camping in the Dordogne, and the pain & baguettes delivered each morning were lovely, but imho, this bread is better.

Breakfast done, it was decision time. Two factors influencing our next move:

1. The water had gone off again in the early hours, but at least we were pretty well stocked up – the “if the water bottle doesn’t have a label on it, then assume it’s grey water and not drinkable” rules came back in force.

2. The most important factor – at midday, it was 43°C in the shade.

Decision made. We do nothing until mid afternoon. However, I struggled with doing nothing, so headed down to the pool where I came up with the best plan.

I got a towel, put the thin edge up to the ‘dry side’ of the pool grate. Put my phone, suncream and earbuds on the towel, then folded it back so that the majority was on the wet side of the grate. I then got in the water, wearing sunglasses & wide brimmed hat, dunked the hat thoroughly, before donning it, and then rested chin & arms on the side of the pool, with arms & shoulders fully covered by a cool, damp towel. I fell asleep it was that good!

At around 3:15, I towelled down and headed upstairs, with the plan being to try the Dolmus (bus) down into Fethiye, and then get a water Taxi to Çalis Beach. I issued a 15 minute “it’s bus, boat, beer and scran evening. Be there, or stay” to Lurchio. He appeared as we were about to leave.

Arriving at the bus stop it only took a couple of minutes to jump on a Fethiye-bound bus…

“Ne kadar tutuyor? Uç?”, I asked (“How much? Three.” I think!). He laughed, and said “Sixty”. I’d like to think he appreciated my attempt, but I’m not sure. “Tash, curl a header in!”, I said as we got off. He laughed again, this time I’m sure sarcastically, but that could be my paranoia.

We wandered from the ‘Fethiye last Stop’ (where I’m hoping we get to change and head up to Saklikent Gorge one day), and meandered through the Old Town, along ‘Umbrella Street’, buying some bracelets for Lurchios mates ‘friend that is a girl but not a girlfriend’ and then headed seaward.

Reaching the harbour, we caught the 5:30pm Water taxi across to Çalis Beach, despite Lurchios protestations. On the way, I spotted a seal and a few jumping fish, leaping out of the sea. No turtles as yet though.

It’s about a half hour trip, pontoon to pontoon. And a very nice one! At the Çalis end, you meander up an estuary to the dock, with lots of birds (and when dusk, bats) to spot.

We had a meander down the beach front, looking for somewhere to eat but Lurchios monstrous appetite seemed to have left him somewhere on the water for now.

I’m with the potential minority. Çalis…it’s not “ugh”, it’s not “amazing”, it’s not even “meh”, but it’s “ok”. I get why folk go and I’m glad we have, but that’s all. Nice beach. Seems quieter than Olu probably would be, but that’s a guess.

Strangely, he was able to force down two bottles of Corona with lime, at the bar we stopped at. Must be the lime that settled his stomach, I’m guessing.

About now, I had an Amazon Delivery alert. Special shout out to my wonderful neighbourino who put away my “special shoes”. Oh, and her hubby who changed the battery on our lounge PIR. Which, for those that know of our “lounge” must have been a feat of free-climbing! Amazed he survived!

After that, Jane & I fancied some food, so irrespective of Lurchio Pugwash’s scurvy-ridden sea legs, we called in at a neighbouring seafront “Traditional Turkish” restaurant. The food was really good & lived up to the ‘traditional’ label as well.

Plenty hummus & bread, with a Turkish version of a mint raita and I had the vegetarian snails again (sautéed mushrooms), before Jane & I ordering the chicken “sheshlich” (Shish kebabs).

And Pugwash’s appetite stretched to ordering one of the more expensive things on the menu, the lamb, eating the meat, and leaving the rest. I won’t stoop to emojis, but you can imagine which one I’d have chosen.

As well as the searing heat even at sunset, there also seemed to be a big slice of karma floating around, which landed on Lurchio, as he was informed we were now getting on a water taxi back to Fethiye Harbour.

No emojis, no gifs, but the gif would be the “Kevin & Perry” Kevin gif when his parents told him anything he didn’t want to hear – you know…the head thrown back dramatically with choreographed slump of the shoulders. That one.

We got the 8:30pm back, which docked at Fethiye at 9pm. The next decision was easy. Go home & drag misery-guts with us.

On the Dolmus (60TLR for 3 again) out of Fethiye Centre, and at 9:30pm, the bus stops were showing that it’s 36°C. And sticky hot.

We hopped off at the bottom of our road, nipped in the corner shop for some actual Lurpak (only Allah knows how much that cost us, thankfully), some soft drinks and a couple of harder, cool ones.

Back at the apartment, I headed straight to the pool, wrote most of this guff and supped a beer, all whilst dangling in the pool. Don’t ask what was dangling. Just be aware we are not overlooked.

Cooled, I headed back upstairs, wrote the paragraph after this one and then called it a night.

Probably a slow one (no change there then) tomorrow, as it’s peaking at over 45°C apparently!

Scorchio, scorchio!

Peace & love, folks

Chris

X

Firstly, let me make sure that the recent lack of water is put into context. It’s been a minor inconvenience and hasn’t stopped us doing anything.

But, at 7:15am, when I heard the toilet cistern gurgle and begin filling, I was relieved (no pun intended). The moment it was full, I went around and flushed all toilets (we have 4!). They all then refilled, so whatever happened we had 2 half flushes per loo to deploy where required!

Right! Let’s move on from water now that the floodgates have opened, and find something else to obsess about. Oh, go on then, let’s make it about the heat…

It’s been 40°C here today for most of the day (11-6pm). That’s quite hot. We’ve been hotter though. A lot, lot hotter! We’ve been lucky enough to holiday in the US, and been to some of the worlds most amazing places. One of which (one of Jane & my favourites) is Death Valley, where we experienced 54 point something degrees Celsius at the “Devils Golfcourse” on the salt flats.

If you’ve read any earlier posts you may remember we booked to go to Fez Bars BBQ Night tonight, and that’s a good walk in this heat, or a £3 Taxi ride (much more likely) down to Hisaronu, so to be honest, there was no point going anywhere today. As I wrote at the back end of yesterdays post, there’s nothing negative about that – we’ve the pool, the bar, the views, the breeze, the privacy. It’s bloody brilliant here.

So that’s what we did! Hung around the pool, wondering if we will see Lurchio today until tea time, watching the Jays & doves fly down and take a cheeky, sneaky drink from the pool.

We didn’t see Lurchio until 5 minutes after we said we’d meet to walk down to the Taxsi. But hey, ho, in the meantime, we’d had nice showers so felt “scrubbed fresh”.

After a short wait for a cab, we headed down to the top end of Hisaronu, for a meander down to Fez Bar. I won’t ever not smile at some of the shop names, with “Jimmy Shoes” being one of my favourites.

Greeted wholesomely by the bar team, as always, we were seated facing where the live music would be performed. After a brief wait whilst others settled in, the BBQ was served. Really good “all you can eat” food, at a great price (a Tenner each). The chicken kebabs were really good as were the meatballs. I went tactical and avoided bread, chips etc on the first trip, and returned for seconds when polite to do so!

Just after 9pm, Emre Evren connected up his guitar, turned on his amp & played a few good sing-along songs. I knew he had hit his target audience because Lurchio shrank in on himself to get away.

At the first break, just after 10pm, a lad who I think was called Holly sang three covers and one song he had written that had been played on BBC Radio. “Privacy”, I think he called it. He was also very good – had a great vocal.

As Jane had now finished the dregs of tonight’s cocktail, a Strawberry Daiquiri, we decided it was time to head home before Jane ended up in a ditch or got lairy.

A short taxi ride back and that’s us done for today. Water is still on, albeit with a little air in the pipes (apparent when you use the ‘bidet’ function in the toilet – trust me, you notice!), we’ve full cisterns, and reserves are replenished should we need them.

Tomorrow is forecast to be in the early/mid 40s (43/44°C), so we’ll see what takes our fancy when we get up.

Night folks,

Chris

X

Hmm. You know I mentioned the water being off on Day 1? Well…

It was off again from yesterday evening, to the point where they had small bowser trucks pumping tanked water into some restaurants, and having now joined a Facebook group specifically about infrastructure and services (water, ellecy), it seems it affected businesses with them having to close later that evening.

Given our impression so far is that it’s a quieter season (almost like for like weeks), it can’t be blamed on tourist demand, as suggested on some posts. Others seem to be suggesting that there is a general shortage of water, which seems to be backed up by posts I’ve seen from Muski, the water company, who are proposing area-based schedules, so you can at least flush toilets, fill cisterns & store grey water in containers.

Anyway, as I was finishing up & uploading yesterdays blog, I thought “time for a nightcap” & went to the fridge to grab a cold beer. Seems I’m too slow, as Lurchio had nabbed the last one, and the second to last. Given he had had 2 Bomonti with the Chinese, and two Corona in Fez Bar, I suspect he’s been somewhat “dehydrated” today.

My sleep was my seemingly now-usual pattern of fast to sleep, but then a 5am-8am struggle, after which I crash out ands wake up dazed a couple of hours later!

Our plan was to go down to Oludeniz, at midday, then to one of the Blue Lagoon private beaches for mid-afternoon, and then have more of a look around than we did last year & grab something to eat.

I was late to ‘breakfast’, so much so that even Lurchio (who I suspect fell into a beer-induced slumber early on) was up & on his balcony scoffing the fresh bread that Jane had nipped to the corner shop for.

It was noticeably hotter this morning, with even the light breeze having the occasional hot blast feel to it. As such we decided that it was likely unbearable down on the beach, so we decided to stay at the apartment until mid-afternoon and then head into Fethiye for a stroll, a cold beer, and maybe a little ferry ride to Çalis.

I’d mentioned in a previous blog that the name of the city of Fethiye has some chunky history to it, and regionally, I wrote a bit about the Greco-Turkish war in 1919-1922 on Day 13 of last years blog.

It’s an ancient city, that was part of the Persian empire from as early as 500+ BC, and the Ottoman Empire until 1922, at which point the Turkish/Greek “switcheroo” (see link above) meant mass forced migrations, at which point it was known as Makri (“the long one”).

Prior to that, back in 1914, a Captain in the Ottoman Airforce, Mr Fethi Bey along with three relatives, decided it’d be a bit of a laugh to try to be the first to fly from Istanbul to Cairo, in a Bleriot airplane. Spoiler alert – they didn’t make it and crashed & died on 27 February 1914.

It’s not much of a challenge to figure out where they crashed and so in 1934, the city was renamed Fethiye in his honour!

As we all headed down to the pool, a new episode of 93:20Pod “Thirty Questions” (Tom) dropped, so that was next on our agenda. A deliberately eclectic mix of questions put to one member of the team, some deep & philosophical, some just as important, like best and worst flavours of crisps.

This prompted us to answer along, which was actually quite good fun. Debates over “has their been a perfect film*” and “the perfect Friday evening – food, drink and film”.

(*it’s “Star Wars: Rogue One”, and “The Shawshank Redemption” in case you’re wondering).

Around 5pm we headed back to the apartment to see if we could shower & freshen up for a trip to Fethi Beys resting place. Short answer? No. Still no water. On the Facebook group it seems the natives are getting restless. To the level that a neighbouring town/village had come together and began a protest march!

Given we couldn’t shower, and still had a layer of chlorine & water resistant suncream on, we decided a dolmus or Taxsi to Fethiye sounded a bit grim. So we changed tack again, and instead headed the 0.75 miles down the upper/old road to Karizma hoping they were serving. (It was warm!).

We were in luck. At 6:45pm we squeezed in as the last available table.

The food & service were superb. Starters of garlic mushrooms (I’m on a mushroom fetish at the mo’), some mini kebabs & the “Karizma Parcels” (filo triangle pasties filled with mince, cheese & herbs). Mains were Seabass, a beef kebab, and Lurchio chose a big fillet steak because he’s not paying the “Hesap” (bill). It looked bloody gorgeous mind and it seemed to cut like warm butter. Suffice to say all plates were emptied!

Oh, Jane once again hit the cocktails. I’m starting to get worried this may be a trend which I need to control/curb post-holiday!

A slow walk up the hill back to the apartment followed, despite my lazy protestations & moaning about my pair of knackered Achilles and grade 4 osteoarthritis in my knee. “Get on with it and close your fitness ring”, Jane replied. I hadn’t even noticed it was showing!

Anyway, we got back, but I didn’t even go in the apartment, instead heading to the pool, where I opened a cold one, stripped down to my undercrackers and sat with my legs in the pool whilst writing this. The joy of which, apart for it being cooling and relaxing was that I got to meet the bats who occasionally imitated 617 Squadron by “Dambustering” their way across the pool at low level before snaffling a midge and heading back, whilst dodging nightfighters. Some of that was not factually true.

It’s call to prayer time now, so I’ll be respectful, chill out and think good thoughts, whilst avoiding nodding off and ending up fully in the pool.

Going to be honest, what we do (or don’t do) will be dictated by water availability tomorrow. We’ve stockpiled grey water for flushing, and the swimming pool may well end up more of a bath, but hopefully something gets sorted soon.

That said, it’s an ‘inconvenience’ that’s all. If we end up staying around the apartment for two weeks, with our private pool & fully stocked bar, serving Bomonti at £1.20 per 500ml bottle, that doesn’t sound like a holiday I’d turn down!

Have a cracker folks (and yes, conscious that the UK weather is somewhat different to here!).

Stay safe, peace & love,

Chris